


what they don't tell you in churches

by iwillwalk500miles



Series: Genesis' White Rose Week Prompts for 2020!! [6]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, F/F, Love at First Sight, POV Third Person Limited, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Ruby Rose-centric, White Rose Week 2020 (RWBY), but nothing is really resolved, jacques schnee is a douchebag, just realized i worked out a little bit of my relgious trauma in this i apologize in advance, like a little bit tho, maybe i'll write a continuation for this later idk, ruby falls in love with weiss before she even knows her name, so like they have a sorta happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:02:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24575002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iwillwalk500miles/pseuds/iwillwalk500miles
Summary: (White Rose Week 2020: goddesses + love at first sight + curse)The first time Ruby follows the pull in her chest she is fifteen and curious. It takes her to the forest, deep and dark and dangerous. The winter chills everything, the green pine trees stark against the snow covered ground. That’s where she finds her, the girl—clad in a pale white gown, snowflakes as red as the flush in her cheeks littering the collar of the dress and slowly going down, a spiral. She sees her hair, pure and white as the snow that surrounds them, and stops in her tracks, staring staringstaring—and she meets oddly familiar eyes, though they are as cold as ice and twice as pretty.There is a girl in the forest.There is aprettygirl in the forest. Her eyes sharp and her chin round, pale freckles across the bridge of a strong nose and an almost delicate set of lips. It awakens something deep inside Ruby’s soul, and she yearns like she’s never done before—it hits her then, how she wants and wants andwants—(She’s never quitewantedlike this before.)Or;They tell her that her mother was a saint.
Relationships: Ruby Rose/Weiss Schnee
Series: Genesis' White Rose Week Prompts for 2020!! [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776382
Comments: 44
Kudos: 131





	what they don't tell you in churches

**Author's Note:**

> okay, so like, a fair warning for the following things:
> 
> religion, mentions of character death, a really fucked up curse, and uh, i dunno anything else that comes with that.
> 
> it isn't actually super super dark, but i wanted to be safe, so!! if u read this u can't complain

They tell her that her mother was a saint. She sits in the pews, the pastor of the church leaning down, placing his heavy hand on her shoulder gently. They whisper of the coming of their god in her eyes—silver, whisper that she was a _miracle_ , that her mother was a _saint_. 

“You will grow to slay a great many evils.” The pastor says to her as her dad begins to usher her away, his eyes narrowed in thinly veiled anger at the other man. “It has been foretold.” His eyes (dead, blue, terrifying to a tiny five year old still struggling with the fact that her mother was _gone_ ) flicker to her dad. “There is nothing you can do to stop it.”

“Watch me.” Her dad hisses, and the church doors slam behind them as he gently leads his daughter to the family car, where her uncle waits with her older sister.

“Don’t listen to him, Petal—” He pauses when Ruby flinches at the nickname. A sigh escapes his lips, and he kneels down. “Ruby, I won’t let anything happen to you.”

But Ruby can already feel it, that deep apprehension in her too fragile bones—can already feel something tugging her at her chest, away from her church and her dad and into the frozen woods that separate it all. Snow falls into her dark crimson hair, wind blowing it out of the weak braid her dad had tried to help her with in the morning—the one she didn’t have the heart to ask him to redo—and for a moment she thinks that she hears another little girl’s laughter in the cold air, trickling into her ears and making her cheeks flush red.

“Okay.” She whispers to her dad, small hands tugging on the collar of a red scarf—the last thing her mother had left to her. “Okay.”

He takes her home, and Yang reads her a bedtime story—but throughout it all she can still hear it, that little girl's bitter laughter ringing in her ears even as she finally lays her head to rest.

Things are different with her mom gone. Ruby has fuzzy memories of her mother as she grows, static and full of spots—the only thing she can grasp the warmth of a woman with a single strange glowing eye and the safety that came in hiding in her cloak. 

Ruby has an odd childhood. 

The lights flicker when she goes near them, to the point where her sister would tug her away from the lightbulbs—eyeing the pieces of glass mistrustfully as she grips Ruby’s hand in her grubby little palms. The other kids notice something strange in her eyes, an odd eariness that everyone in Ruby’s family had resolved to ignore. Once, when she was without Yang, they tried to pick on her. When she comes home, her knees scabbed and cuts on her arms and legs, something odd happens.

Her sister’s eyes bleed red, shining shining _shining—_

The other kids don’t try to hurt her again, much more content to just ignore her.

Sometimes Ruby wakes up to the sound of familiar laughter. She lays there, bundled under her red covers and surrounded by her favorite stuffed animals, and listens to the sound of someone around her age laughing bitterly. 

It’s strange though, as Ruby grows the voice seems to grow with her.

The first time Ruby follows the pull in her chest she is fifteen and curious. It takes her to the forest, deep and dark and dangerous. The cold winter chills everything, the green pine trees a stark contrast against the snow covered ground. That’s where she finds her, the girl—clad in a pale white gown, snowflakes as red as the flush in her cheeks littering the collar of the dress and slowly going down, a spiral. She sees her hair, pure and white as the snow that surrounds them, and stops in her tracks, staring staring _staring_ —and she meets oddly familiar eyes, though they are as cold as ice and twice as pretty.

There is a girl in the forest.

There is a _pretty_ girl in the forest. Her eyes sharp and her chin round, pale freckles across the bridge of a strong nose and an almost delicate set of lips. It awakens something deep inside Ruby’s soul, and she yearns like she’s never done before—it hits her then, how she wants and wants and _wants_ —

(She’s never quite _wanted_ like this before.)

“You’re here.” The Girl says, nose wrinkled in disgust. She crosses her arms, glowering fiercely at Ruby with an almost surprising strength. “Come to slay us then, oh _empowered_ one?”

“What?” Ruby asks, voice far too sharp and far too loud in the open air of the frozen forest. Her heart thuds rapidly in her chest, pounding and pounding and _pounding_ until Ruby is absolutely sure that the girl in front of her must be able to hear. “I don’t—”

The Girl scoffs, crossing her arms, and it occurs to Ruby that she must be around the same age as her. “You can’t convince me! I’ll _never_ trust one of you, never!” Her eyes seem to glow—( _blue as ice and twice as pretty_ )—and she turns away. She moves deeper into the forest, and Ruby can’t help herself.

“Wait!” She calls, surging forward. She’s always been fast, always been good at running running _running_. But for some reason her talent seems to fail her, just this once, and she finds that The Girl is nowhere to be seen. She follows her footsteps, but the imprints stop abruptly, and it is as though the girl had melted into the snow around her.

(It’s only after Ruby starts the trek home that she realized that the pull in her chest hadn’t bothered her in the presence of the stranger with hair like snow.)

“I saw a girl in the forest today.” Ruby says over the dinner table. She kicks her legs out and under her chair, drumming her fingers along her seat as she does her best not to move too much. “She was really pretty.”

Yang passes her the peas, snorting at the look of distaste on her face. “Eat your veggies, _then_ we can talk about pretty girls.” They were alone, their father working late and their uncle passed out on the couch reeking of something Ruby doesn’t like to think about.

“But she was _really_ pretty, Yang!” She insists, waving her arms above her head spastically as she tries to convey just how _pretty_ the girl she had seen was. “She was super duper pretty, Yang! Prettier than the roses in the springtime, prettier than the glittery thing when the sun hits the snow! Really _really_ pretty!”

Yang doesn’t seem to care how pretty the stranger was and says, “Eat your veggies.” She pauses for a moment. "And make sure you throw your scarf in the wash when you're done."

Ruby pouts and obliges.

She doesn’t forget The Girl, even as another winter comes and goes, and though the pull is still there—clawing endlessly at her chest like some rabid animal, she can never muster up the time to follow it. She doesn’t lack courage, it’s only that all of a sudden her dad was watching her a great deal more closely. Her sixteenth birthday comes and goes, and exactly one month after Halloween, she sees her again.

“Hi.” Ruby says, tripping over her words as she scrambles forward a little. The pull at her chest is soothed with proximity to the strange girl, and for some reason Ruby can’t find herself complaining.

The Girl is a little bit taller than her, now—though Ruby doesn’t mind, because she’s still every bit as pretty as the last time she’d seen her. Her hair is up in an uneven ponytail, her hair beautiful and glossy like some type of princess, and Ruby is struck by the sight of her pretty collarbones. 

_Can a person have pretty collarbones?_

“ _You_.” The Girl says with a sneer, anger bubbling just under the surface of her alabaster skin. 

Ruby thinks that she looks made of porcelain or marble, or some sort of strange mix of the two—delicate and strong at the same time. “Um.” She says. “Me?”

“I told you never to come here again!” The Girl hisses angrily, taking big fuming steps toward Ruby. 

“Actually, you never said that—”

“It was _implied_.” She grips Ruby by her scarf and shoves her back, sending Ruby sprawling into the snow with wide eyes and too flushed cheeks. “Leave! Leave and tell your _blasted_ church to—”

“What church?” Ruby blurts, blinking up at the girl rapidly. Her brows furrow, and Ruby suddenly feels a little bit of indignation. “And why’d you do that? Now my pants are all wet!” She glares, getting up on shaky knees and trying to wipe off the imprints of snow. Ruby grips at her scarf, hastily adjusting it back to normal. “Gosh, Yang is gonna _kill_ me when I get home.”

That was probably not true, but she would be on the receiving end of some exasperated looks.

“You...” The Girl is frowning, staring at Ruby with an odd look in her eyes. “What do you mean _what_ _church_?”

“Uh.” Ruby says, suddenly feeling a little bad. “Are you religious or something? I’m sorry if I offended you—”

“Religious?” The Girl scoffs, shaking her head and crossing her arms. “No, definitely not.” Her words are loaded with something Ruby doesn’t know, but she doesn’t mind—after all, Ruby’s used to feeling confused when someone talks to her.

“Oh, okay.” She smiles, and extends her hand. “I’m Ruby Rose.”

“And I’m not here anymore.” She says, turning away from her and walking deeper into the frozen forest.

Watching her walk away is the strangest thing. Ruby feels a draw to her, gripping her by her chest and making her stumble forward, making her open her mouth in a desperate yell of, “Wait!” Her breath leaves her lungs in puffs, ragged and uncertain. “Wait a sec.”

The Girl freezes. She does not turn to look back at her.

“Can you at least give me your name?” Ruby asks, and it sounds more like begging. “Please? I—I need _something_ , something to remember you by.” She swallows the lump in her throat, and it's like swallowing a bolder. “Please, won’t you?”

The Girl finally meets her gaze, steady ice blue eyes looking over her shoulder. “And why,” she starts, “would I do that?” The girl is gone the same way as last time, a swirl of snow and a mystery the only thing she leaves behind.

(As least when she gets home Yang isn’t there to notice her soaked jeans.)

Completely unrelated, but when Ruby went home she was distracted enough to stray too close to one of the light switches.

(Every lightbulb in the house goes out.)

“You’re back again.” A voice says from up above her, sounding annoyed.

“Uh...” Ruby looks up, blinking wide eyes up at The Girl. It had been a very long time since she’d last seen her, and she had convinced herself that she’d made up the encounters with her. She was glad to learn that she was wrong. “Yeah.”

“Ugh.” The Girls says, only Ruby doesn’t think it’s fair to call her a ‘girl’ anymore. Even before when it was clear that she had been growing older, the sight of her now, so obviously on the cusp of adulthood stripped the air from Ruby’s lungs.

“ _Why_? Didn’t I tell you to never return?” The Woman sneers at her, a look so bone chilling that for a moment Ruby forgets that she’s cold because of the snow.

“Well I mean, I don’t remember if you did... It _was_ like, a year ago.” Ruby mumbles, bringing her knees closer to her chest. She was sitting under the tree where they first met, she had been sitting there for a while. Ruby hadn’t even known _why_ , but she had walked into the forest until every ounce of her being had screamed at her to stop.

And so she had.

“Then your memory is positively rubbish.” The Woman remarks snidely, crossing her arms and gripping at her dress sleeves.

“Gee, thanks, what are you some sort of old timey lady?” Ruby can’t help but scoff, rolling her eyes and trying to ignore the strange blush on her cheeks. Ruby was older than she had been before, she wouldn’t let this strangely pretty person walk all over her like she had before. “Can you even say modern words? Here, try this one—dude.”

“... _dude_?” The Woman asks, looking so adorably confused that for a second Ruby can’t help but melt every so slightly.

“Yeah!” She exclaimed cheerfully, completely forgetting that she had decided to be tough and assertive. “That’s what you call friends.”

“But... we aren’t friends.” The Woman says slowly.

“Oh okay, what are we then?” Ruby asks, leaning her head against the frozen bark of the tree, furrowing her brows as she tries to think of something to say. “Best friends?” She asks hopefully.

“What?” The Woman recoils, “No that’s not—”

“I’ve never had a best friend before! We can do all sorts of things together, like play video games, or read books, or—”

“Child, cease your incessant rambling.” 

“I don’t know what you’re trying to say but I’m _not_ a child!” Ruby protests, leaping to her feet and crossing her arms around her chest. “And you could _hardly_ call me that ‘cause you look like we’re the same age!”

“You’ve grown... taller than before.” The Woman points out suddenly, taking a step backward, making Ruby feel irrationally guilty.

“Yeah, my sister says it’s because I drink a lot of milk.” Ruby says, meeting the chilly gaze of the woman in front of her. Her eyes seem to glitter, sparkling as prettily as when the sun’s rays meet the snow. Ruby grimaces, suddenly becoming uncomfortable and hunching in on herself.

“Tell me, how many winters have passed since your birth?” The Woman asks, scooting forward to look at Ruby with a critical eye.

“...I’m eighteen.” She says after a moment, her voice a soft mumble. Even though Ruby feels the urge to back away, she feels a much greater desire to stay right where she was. She decides it’s because The Woman is pretty and doesn’t think about it again.

“Mhmm, I see.” The Woman turns away, pressing a hand to her chin and pursing her lips.

“What do you mean?” Ruby asks her cluelessly. What did she see? “Do I have something on my face?” Her hands immediately go for her cheeks, brushing off invisible dirt and whatever The Woman might have noticed.

“You are taller than most.” She points out after a moment, taking another step away from Ruby. She’s frowning, as though that information bothers her.

“Uh.” Ruby shifts, confused. “You said that?”

“No, I said that you were taller than before, now I’m saying you are currently taller than most I’ve come across.” The Woman says, as though her words made everything clear and she was disappointed in Ruby for not being able to piece it together.

“...is that not what I said?” She asks tentatively, her shoulders slumping in on themselves as she wraps her arms loosely around her stomach.

“No.” The Woman says, a frown on her face.

“...you make words more confusing than they already are.” Ruby grumbles, shivering suddenly, and tries to ignore the way that a flicker of a smirk makes its way across The Woman’s face.

“Why are you here, Ruby Rose? Why can’t you stay away? I would’ve thought the church had convinced you of your _destiny_ by now.” She scoffs, jutting out a hip and leaning forward, and even though she’s shorter than Ruby it feels a lot like she was looking down on her. “Unless you _are_ here to kill us all, of course.”

“Lady, I still have no clue what you’re talking about.” She replies, tilting her head. Ruby isn’t exactly annoyed or angry, but she was getting really _really_ tired of all this ‘church’ talk. 

The Woman watches her for a moment, her sharp eyes scrutinizing her with such intensity that Ruby can’t help the blood that starts to rush to her cheeks. The Woman looks away, sighing, and Ruby takes the second of reprieve to catch her breath. “That is becoming more and more apparent, Ruby Rose.”

“Jeez, when you say my name like _that_ I get the shivers.” She says with a laugh, before she freezes, her mouth falling shut. She had _not_ meant for that to be said out loud.

“You... what?” And The Woman looks confused again, but it was different from earlier, with her ears coloring red in a way that Ruby doesn’t remember seeing before. She almost looked embarrassed.

“Um.” Ruby felt like her arms were frozen to her sides. She hastily looks away and starts to ramble out, “Nothing, nevermind, forget about it—”

“Right.” But she looked suitably thrown off guard. “You...” Her cheeks color, and she shakes her head—white tresses falling into her eyes. “You would do well not return here.” The voice she uses is softer than the last times she had heard it, and Ruby can’t help but feel that it isn’t sincere. “Next year, when the next winter comes, do not come back.”

“Okay.” Ruby says, lying very badly.

“Seriously.” The Woman says. “Don’t.”

“Uh huh, totally won’t come back.” She nods seriously before pausing, expression guilty. “That was a lie I’m so sorry.”

“Ugh.” The Woman glowers up at her.

The look of scorn on her face is almost enough to make Ruby vow never to return, but something inside of her glues her lips shut. She can’t _not_ come back, the tug in her chest wouldn’t allow it—she’d be led here again and again and again and again—and it felt as though there was nothing she could do to stop it.

“I’m sorry.” Ruby says, her lips trembling. “Honest.”

“Don’t make that face.” The Woman turns away, her face screwing up in such an expression of discomfort that Ruby is almost surprised. She opens her mouth again, as though to say something more, but then decides against it, The Woman nods at her stiffly and then retreats into the trees.

Ruby follows, and just like the times before, her footprints disappear.

Completely unrelated, but when Ruby went home she was distracted enough to stray too close to one of the light switches.

(Every lightbulb in the house explodes.)

“Oh.” A voice interrupts her reading, coming from above her. “I’d hoped you wouldn’t come.”

Ruby looks up, meeting the Woman’s eyes with a hesitant smile. A year had passed since the last time they’d seen each other, and Ruby had been sad to notice that she was slowly forgetting her features. She was glad to see The Woman again, even if it was only for a moment.

(She doesn’t think she’d ever regret meeting her in the woods.)

“I can’t help it.” Ruby admits, her voice soft.

“That is becoming increasingly obvious.” The Woman scoffs, crossing her arms and joining her on the snowy grass. Ruby notices that she doesn’t make any indents in the snow. “At least tell me this, why do you return? What draws you here?”

“Well, I mean, you’re interesting I guess... and when I’m near you it’s like... it’s like I’ve been set free, I guess? I don’t feel... I don’t feel the tether anymore.”

It was true. The strange pull was a constant in her life, yanking her back and forth and tugging and tugging and _tugging_ until Ruby couldn’t take it anymore. It faded near The Woman, maybe not entirely, but _enough_ _._ (Enough for Ruby to stomach the cold that surrounded her, to sink into the snow in pure _relief._ ) 

“A tether?” She asks, furrowing her brow. She glances down at her knees, her hands drumming against them as she hummed.

Ruby blinks, entranced. “Uh, yeah.”

“Most suspicious.” The Woman sighs, leaning her head back and baring her neck, closing her eyes looking up to face the sun.

Ruby swallows and tries to ignore the way that the sunlight frames her face. She opens her mouth to speak, her voice coming out squeaky, “I mean, I guess?”

“Have you met with the church?” The Woman sighs, opening up a single eye to meet Ruby’s gaze head on.

“Still don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.” Ruby remarks, giving into the temptation to turn away. 

A part of her can’t stand the constant stream of talk about this mysterious ‘church.’ The way she talks about it, like she expects Ruby to have some sort of blind faith in an institution she doesn’t even know the name of. It’s disheartening. The words that The Woman had said made it seem like she expected Ruby to commit this horrible crime, to ‘vanquish’ something or another.

It's almost terrifying.

“...I wonder.” The Woman begins, breaking the silence, her tone pensive.

“What?” Ruby asks, looking back up.

“Would you mind it terribly if I were to tell you a story? It will not take long, I swear it.”

Ruby blinks for a moment, before allowing a tentative smile to stretch across her face. “I love stories.”

“I do so hope that you don’t become fond of this one.” Her voice is full of unrestrained malice, but she is smiling. The curve of her lips is somehow genuine and bitter all at the same time, a phenomenon that seems adamant on stealing the breath from Ruby’s lungs.

The Woman tells her a story of a man, like most stories tended to center on. She talks of him, of his mortality and his life, of how he longed for an eternity of youth and the freedom of the pain that came with growing older. She tells her, chilly eyes glittering in something close to rage, of a woman he came across. This woman was immortal, of course, because stories always make men come across the things that they want. 

He steals her away from her family, isolates her and calls it a grand love story, and while she is in the semi-domestic bliss of raising his half human children—he kills her mother and father. It’s horrible, tragic—a terrible awful thing to do and keep hidden away, but he does not see it as it is—his eyes painting a misleading picture of _power._

He founded a church over their bones, he takes their magic and releases it on accident, attracting the attention of someone else. 

(Another immortal, one with eyes that creatures of darkness always seem to flinch away from.)

_Why have you done this?_ The immortal thing asks him. _You have damned yourself to an eternity, a curse._

_If immortality is a prison, then I am glad to be a prisoner._ The man replied. 

_That is good._ The goddess tells him. _Because I have been wanting for one._

And so the goddess built him a prison, trapped him in the halls of the church he had built. And the goddess took her symbol, a cross that shines bright bright _bright_ , and branded it onto his body—so effectively destroying his freedom, so effectively punishing his misdeeds. He would not step a foot past his wooden pews, a single step past his church doors.

But this man was far more clever than anyone had given him credit for. He takes her brand, and reveals it to all who come by, he claims it to be a gift of a saint, claims that a benevolent and divine being had bestowed it upon him, had chosen him to be a messenger—a prophet. _And if you do not believe me,_ he said to all who would listen, _simply try and take it from me._

All who try fail, and they choose to follow him.

But the goddess grows angry, and decides once more to worsen his punishment. _From the ashes your flesh and blood will be reborn with the human child I have fostered._ Whispered the goddess, _You will be immortal, but it will always come with a cost._

Only, with the goddess' words came a problem. The man’s flesh and blood did not only belong to him, but the little half-godlings he had fathered.

“What happened next?” Ruby asks, wiggling anxiously and trying to ignore the feeling of snow soaking into her pants. She adjusts her scarf, snuggling her face into it for warmth. “Do the kids get free? Does the man think of a way out of it again?”

The Woman smiles, cold and bitter and _wrong._ “That remains to be seen.”

Ruby stills. She isn’t stupid, she can read between the lines and understand with The Woman is trying to say, but it seems so insane. Who could The Woman be in this story? One of the children? She’d have to be, she aged just like Ruby did, she was older than the first time she’d seen her.

“I’m sorry.” Ruby murmurs, “That the story isn’t as happy as it could’ve been.”

“Please don’t patronize me.” The Woman says, her shoulders stiff and voice strained.

“Patronize?” Ruby frowns, and tries to think for a moment. “Does that mean that you think I’m making fun of you? ‘Cause I’m not! Not making fun of you that is.” She blushes up to her roots, rubbing the back of her neck as she tries not to feel so embarrassed. “I just... if what you told me actually happened it really really sucks and I just wish I could make it _better._ ”

The Woman stares, and Ruby is overcome with the feeling of _something_. Ruby hears blood crashing in her ears, her face going redder and redder as she tries to come to terms with what she sees in her eyes. Snow maybe? A wonderland of winter? But also something warm, like the blue blue sky on a summer or spring day—maybe the ocean when the waves are calm and not so ruthless. 

“Weiss.” She says after a moment, averting her gaze.

Ruby blinks away the sights of the sky, and the sea, and glinting shards of ice—swallowing and coming back to herself. “What?”

“My name,” The Woman says slowly, “Weiss.”

“Oh.” Ruby gasps, she can’t quite find the words to describe the sudden burst of emotion in her chest. 

_I know her name because she chose to give to me._

“Oh?” Weiss raises a brow, looking more and more disgruntled at each second that passes.

Ruby scrambles, her cheeks flushing an even deeper shade of red. “It’s nothing!” She tries to hastily reassure, “It’s just— _well._ ”

“What is it?” Weiss asks, her ears going pink as she crosses her arms impatiently.

“It’s...” Ruby winces. “It’s uh, _pretty_.”

“...pretty?” Weiss blinks, and she doesn’t quite deflate but the defensiveness seems to seep from her shoulders until they’re relaxed. (Well, not entirely relaxed, but until they looked the way they did before.)

“ _Yes_!” She exclaims, not quite sure how she can get away from this situation without making a complete idiot of herself. “I mean, it sounds nice, uh very fitting.”

“Right.” Weiss says, looking down at her hands as though it might stop the blood rushing into her face.

“Right!” Ruby squeaks back, ignoring how cute Weiss looks embarrassed.

Ruby knows that it’s a bad idea as soon as she thinks of it. She’s entirely conscious of how terrible the consequences of what comes with her decision might be, but she can’t think of anything _else_. It feels like the right time, like something was leading her in a different direction than usual, tugging her away from the forest and into something else. 

(But the pull to Weiss was still there, so instead of any sort of relief Ruby felt like she was being ripped in two.)

She remembers the time after her mother’s death, and thinks that maybe (just maybe) that when they told her that Summer Rose was a saint it wasn’t to reassure a dead woman’s daughter that she would be happy in the afterlife.

Ruby goes to her father, she remembers how hasty he had seemed to pull her out of that church, and she knows that he might have information she doesn’t.

And that means taking a risk.

“Dad... um, I’ve been hearing some things.” She starts, leaning against the doorway of the kitchen as her dad cooks lunch. Ruby is careful to lean in the direction opposite of the light switch, if she goes near there’s always a good chance that the bulb it’s connected to will explode.

Funny, almost.

(She didn't have the best sense of humor.)

“Like what?” He asks, jovially humming as he chops up some veggies. 

Ruby watches him for a moment, letting out a soft sigh and forcing herself not to chicken out. “Well, see I met this uh girl, and she was... er, telling me about this... church I think? And she was acting super weird about it, she told me that... she told me that I was meant to... do something.” She swallows. "She uh, she said a lot about a destiny, I think? Called me... 'empowered one.'"

She knows that she'd stumbled over the words but she has a feeling that even if she’d managed to get them out perfectly clear her father would've reacted the same anyway, so she doesn't feel so bad.

(Frozen.)

“...Ruby.” He starts, setting down his knife and reaching for a towel to clean his hands on

“Dad?” She asks as he turns to face her leaning back on the counter.

He looked stricken, like someone had zapped all of his easy happiness right out of him. She hadn’t seen him look like that since her mom had died. “Ruby please don’t go to this girl anymore.”

“What?! _Why_?” She’s ready to start protesting, to make him see reason, but the serious expression on his face makes her pause. 

Dad doesn’t look like that often.

“She...” He sighs, “Tell me, what does she look like? What color is her hair?”

Ruby can’t help but wonder why his questions were important. “Uh, like snow.”

Something in his expression tightens, and he looks pained for a moment before his face shifts. “Ruby _please_ don’t go to this girl anymore.”

“Ok but _why_?” Ruby asks, feeling a little desperate. She can’t stand the idea of not seeing Weiss anymore, can’t stand the idea of the pull just tugging and tugging and _tugging_ without any reprieve.

“...Let me take you somewhere.”

The man is strange, his eyes are similar to Weiss’ in how cold they are, but where Ruby can find comfort in the semi-stranger in the forest, the man only gives her a distinct sense of unease. His collar is wrapped tightly around his neck, his shoulders straight and his church robes pressed and symmetrical. He wears a symbol as a clasp that holds something strange (what almost looks like a cape) to his shoulders. Ruby’s eyes linger on it, the silver cross that looks... familiar, almost—familiar in a way that Weiss did when she had first met her—only Ruby has the strangest desire to reach out and hold it in her hands, to blow warm puffs of air on it until it melts in her palms.

(Which is weird, because she doesn’t run warm enough to melt something like metal.)

“Who—” And her breath catches, because she knows the answer to the question before she asks. “ _You._ ” She knows him, she can see Weiss in his features, he has the same curve of her jaw and shape of her nose. This is her father, Ruby thinks grimly, this was the man damned to a fate most deserving.

He raises a single white eyebrow. “So you remember, do you?”

It takes a moment for Ruby to realize he doesn’t know she knows him in the context of Weiss, and it takes another to remember the trip to the church only hours after her mother was put in the ground.

“None of your games.” Her dad says to the man, drawing Ruby close to his chest as though he wanted to shield her from him, and Ruby privately thinks that maybe it's a little too late for that. “Tell her what you told me.”

The man smiles, and Ruby has the distinct feeling that she’s not going to like what he has to say.

He tells her the story of a man, poor and sickly—a childhood filled with melancholy and sadness. His parents died when he was young, he said, and from the moments of youth to adulthood the man had been overcome by a fear of death. He says this as though she’s supposed to be filled with sympathy, with a righteous sense of _‘that’s sad'_ but she honestly can’t feel anything but the uncertain churning of her stomach.

He tells of the monsters that he found. Three of them, almost a family if not for their too sharp teeth and unnatural control over the world around them. He called them demons.

The pastor looks away, a soft look on his face that Ruby rightfully believes is fake, and whispers words of how the youngest of them had _bewitched_ that young man—cast a spell to make him devoted to only her, and Ruby can’t help the queasy feeling in her stomach as he now looks down at her.

Suddenly she’s five years old again, shocked silent and still after the death of her mother, sitting in the pews staring up at the man in fear, and barely manages not to lose her lunch.

He says that they have children, three of them.

Ruby feels sick.

The first was aloof and indifferent, the pastor says, cold like the winter and just as unyielding; and it was appropriate that she was to be Winter.

The second was cruel and entitled, the pastor spits, sharp like ice and twice as unfeeling; and she was to be Weiss.

The third was cowardly and manipulative, the pastor sighs, fickle as the flowers in a meadow but as chilly as the rest of his siblings; and he was to be Whitley.

But there was a creature who’d seen the young man, had noticed that he’d become bewitched, and set him free. It was not until he got a good look at her, that he realized that she was no creature at all; but a _saint._ He tells her how she pressed her cross to his chest, and had told him that as long as he lived no being should be able to take it off, a proof of her protection over him.

Then she left to slay the demons, and she succeeded—but at a terrible cost.

She was bound to the soul of a human child, turning their brown hair and eyes crimson and silver respectively, and the demons were forced into a cycle of rebirth the same as her.

_Do you see now?_ He asks. _Who your mother was? Who you will become?_

And Ruby—(sick to her stomach and wanting _desperately_ to leave)—grasps her dad by the arm and _runs._

(She can't help but wonder what would have become of her if he told her his story before Weiss told Ruby her own, and decides that she was better off not knowing.)

“Do you believe him?” Her dad asks her as they drive home, his voice serious.

“No.” Ruby whispers.

“Neither did I.” He sighs in relief. “Do you believe the children in the forest?”

_Children?_

Weiss had siblings, she'd forgotten that through all the terror she'd felt in the church that she'd come away with new information about her sort-of friend.

“Yes.” Ruby says softly. "I do."

“So did your mother.” He murmurs, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel. “I can’t stop you from going to meet them, I’m not going to... but please be careful, they... they may as well be gods, and you can never trust types like that, I think.” 

It sounded as though he spoke from experience.

They’re home before Ruby can process exactly what he’d said, before she can ask about her mother. Even though she’d clung to every piece of knowledge about her that her father and uncle were willing to share, she couldn’t quite muster up the courage to ask.

She grabs her bike and her backpack the second she gets home and rushes to the forest. She had to meet Weiss, she had to tell her that she’d met her father. Ruby knew that it might be futile, knew that for some odd reason she’d only managed to ever see Weiss once a year, no matter how much she looked for her. 

Ruby huffs, hiding her bike under some snow and branches, and rushes deeper into the forest. She has to readjust her beanie more than once, the branches of the pine trees smacking against her head and nearly taking it off her head.

“Weiss?” She called, her breath shuddering as she finally made it to the place where they met each other. “Weiss! I need to talk to you!”

Ruby shivers, wrapping her arms around her chest in an attempt to keep warm and burrowing her face into her scarf. Maybe it was a mistake to go rushing out of the house without bringing along a jacket to put over her hoodie. She grimaces, deciding she doesn’t care if she gets hypothermia, and moves deeper into the forest, calling out to Weiss every couple of seconds.

She finds her sitting on a group of rocks, in front of a large frozen lake with a matching small waterfall encased in sharp ice. Weiss sighs, and unlike Ruby no visible puffs of air are released from her mouth. She holds a handful of snow to her face, and from behind her Ruby can see that she’s wincing slightly.

Ruby feels a swooping sense of nervousness settle over her as she realizes this was the first time she’d caught Weiss unawares.

“Weiss!” She calls, huffing and puffing, “Hey—”

Weiss turns, and Ruby goes still.

The snow she holds was stained red.

“What happened?!” She surges forward, tripping into the snow. Ruby scrambles hastily to her feet, groaning a little but still rushing to get to Weiss’ side, she trips again—this time unable to stop from crying out. She gets to her knees, propping up her arms against the large rocks Weiss sits on and pushes herself up a bit. From this angle she had to look up at her.

“Ruby?” Weiss asks in shock, dropping the snow in surprise. 

She freezes a foot away from her, staring at the left side of her face and blinking. There, where there had been nothing just a few days before, was a bloody scar. A slash of what looked like some sort of blade, and Ruby feels sick to her stomach at the amount of blood that stained her skin. “Your eye—are you alright? Do you need anything? I can—”

“Ruby.” Weiss reaches out with the hand not stained with her own blood, setting it on Ruby’s shoulder to steady her. “You visited the church.” Her lips curl upward, wry and almost sad.

“I...” She blinks, wondering how Weiss had known. “Yeah I did.”

“Will...” Weiss takes a soft breath. “Will you do the same as your predecessor?”

“My mom?”

“Yes.” She twitches, bringing her hand away from her shoulder, but not before brushing a bit of snow from her hoodie.

“She didn’t hurt you right? Because I don’t want to hurt you.” Ruby admits quietly. “I... I never want to hurt you.”

Weiss stares, and for a moment Ruby could swear that her cheeks had turned pink. She coughs, averting her gaze for a moment before sighing.

“Weiss?” Ruby asks quietly, noticing the hardened look in her eyes and the furrow of her brow. When she doesn’t answer Ruby swallows nervously, resolving herself. 

Her fingers shake.

“Yang makes me bring a first aid kit everywhere I go.” She says softly, reaching into her bag and pulling it out. “I don’t really have anything for a cut that big, but I do have some wet wipes if you want to clean the blood off of your face.”

“I don’t—” Weiss pauses. “I can’t—”

Ruby holds the wipes in her hand reaching up to hand them to her, when Weiss doesn’t take them she pouts. “At least let me clean it for you if you’re not gonna do anything about it.”

Weiss hesitates, but nods in consent, leaning her face close enough for Ruby to reach.

She pauses for a brief moment, wondering if she really was going to be allowed to do this, before scooting forward and gently wiping the blood off of Weiss’ face. Ruby wants to ask what happened, wants to know how she’d ended up with a slash down her left eye, but is afraid of what Weiss might say or do.

She doesn’t want Weiss to feel uncomfortable, not around her.

“I didn’t expect for you to come today.” Weiss starts quietly, her eyes closed as she stays still under Ruby’s gentle hands.

Ruby forces herself not to jump, swallowing for a moment as she wiped the last remnants of semi-dried blood on her face. She’s careful not to think about how close they are now. “Why not?”

“You’re usually only allowed this once a year, having you come so soon has...” Weiss sighs, a shuddering sound. “It’s upset something within myself.”

“I’m sorry.” Ruby says, meaning it.

“You shouldn’t be.” Is Weiss’ immediate response. She opens her eyes, “You can visit more often, if you like... just take care not to be followed, and if you see someone who isn’t me take care not to be seen, or at least not to aggravate them.”

Ruby stills, startlingly aware of the fact that her thumb was brushing lightly against her cheek. “Oh.” She swallows the lump in her throat, hesitating when her hand lingered in the air near Weiss’ cheek. Ruby removed it, managing a smile, “Awesome.”

“Yes.” The look on Weiss’ face is soft now. “I suppose it is.”

Ruby looks back at her, summoning every ounce of courage she could muster. “What happened, Weiss?” She asks softly, “Why are you hurt?”

“It’s...” Weiss eyed her for a moment, searching her expression for something that Ruby couldn’t ever possibly identify. Her lips twitched downward, but she didn’t look away. “It happens to all of us eventually, in every new life.” 

“What do you mean?” Ruby asks her, completely bewildered.

“I’ll... explain it to you in a moment, just let me find my words.” Weiss murmurs, turning her head away, looking disgruntled.

“Of course!” She hastily agreed, leaning backward a little so that Weiss could have space if she needed it.

And so, with a shaky sigh and slightly trembling fingers, Weiss began to explain. Her very existence was a curse, she said, she was reborn again and again and again from the ashes like a phoenix, she said, losing all memory before slowly regaining them as she grew. Weiss explained her godhood, how it was stripped from her by accident because she happened to share blood with a man who’d spited someone else.

She told Ruby of her mother who had long since given up on her children ever becoming _normal_ again. So someone else had raised them, a not-quite-human man who lived forever but wasn’t a god. 

And she told her of her ancestors.

(How they _hurt_ her.)

“Each time my father spins a story for one of you Roses we get a warning.” Weiss says bitterly, she points to her scar—still an angry red but rapidly fading in color, almost as though it was healing. “This is where I was struck when I first died, it’s the same for my brother and sister—we’re connected by our scars, and our scars are connected to you.” 

It was silent for a moment as Ruby tried to come to terms with what Weiss had said.

She laughs, a hollow sound, breaking the moment. “Well, now that I think about it the scars are connected to when you learn what our father has to say, your _goddess_ took pity on us and cast a tiny spell that would tell us when to _run_.”

“Ah.” Ruby chokes on the fierce burning in the back of her throat. “I’m so sorry.” She looks down, gripping at her hoodie and trying not to cry. That wouldn’t be fair, she thinks, this was _Weiss’_ sad story—caused by who knows how many of her ancestors.

It’s no wonder she didn’t want to be friends with Ruby, the person who had a very real possibility of leading to more pain. “Why?” Ruby asks after a moment, rubbing at her face and hastily getting rid of the evidence of whatever tears may have been there. “Why do you even let me _talk_ to you?”

Weiss’ expression softened after a moment, and she reached out—gently wiping away the tears Ruby had failed to suppress.

“Your... _mother_ spoke to my sister, you speak to me, the one after you will speak to my brother.” Weiss looks away, though her hand remains on Ruby's cheek. “My sister managed to convince your mother to spare us... it was the first time such a thing had happened, Father always sent those of your bloodline to kill us, and they often succeeded—though we don’t actually _stay_ dead, of course.”

“But why?” Ruby asks her, aghast. She rises to her feet, clambering onto the rocks Weiss sat on and leaning closer. “Why talk to us in the first place? If we were gonna... gonna—” Ruby can’t even say it.

Weiss snorts. “I don’t understand it, same as you. It’s a part of the curse, I suppose.” She looks thoughtful, wrapping her arms around her knees and bringing them to her chest. “One of us has to speak to you, learn about you—but well, we aren’t exactly good at _talking_.”

It was quiet again.

“Is it over now?” Weiss asks in a shaky voice, closing her eyes. “Will you kill us?”

“I’m not going to do that.” Ruby says, flinching backward. “I could _never_.”

“You are part god, the same as me.” Weiss says, and when her eyelids open Ruby is astonished to see that they had been ringed an unnatural blue—almost glowing against Weiss’ pale face. “You can end us with a twitch, if you were skilled enough...” A laugh, “It’s happened before.”

“No.” Ruby states firmly, glaring fiercely at her own fists. “Not me, not if it’s you.”

“You do have power, don’t you?” Weiss asks, frowning.

“Lights _are_ weird around me,” Ruby admits, “But that doesn’t _mean_ anything! You—you're _good_ , yeah? You're so very _good_ and you don’t deserve this.”

“I might have.” Weiss warns her. “I wasn’t _mortal_ , Ruby. That came with a lot of... _disregard_ for basic human life.”

“Okay.” Ruby says, frowning now. “But that was before, right? You know what it’s like to fear death now, so you aren’t mean to people anymore, right?”

“Oh I’m still mean to people.” Weiss says. “But now instead of ignoring them when they’re lost in the forest I send them on their way back to town instead of letting them get hypothermia or mauled by bears.”

“That’s progress!” Ruby cheers and decides to ignore the way Weiss had smiled when she said she was mean to people. “See? You’re a good person! A bad person wouldn’t do that stuff.”

Weiss frowns, suddenly looking sullen. “I mean... I suppose.” She pauses for a moment, her expression going grave. “You know they believe my family to be malevolent demons?”

“Yes.” Ruby nods seriously, her smile falling from her face.

“You know they believe my father to be chosen, that they believe the same of you?”

“Yes.” She repeats, her expression not once faltering.

Weiss tilts her head, chewing on her cheek as she considers her. “You are reacting oddly.”

“No,” Ruby says, “no I’m not.”

A pause, and then a slanted smile.

“No,” Weiss sighs, a laugh escaping her throat as she looked up at the cloudy sky. “No I suppose you are not.” 

Now that she’s allowed, Ruby finds herself visiting Weiss in the forest more and more often.

Yang was convinced that she had a girlfriend, and even though her dad had explained everything to her sister about the church and who Weiss was, Yang still insisted on being insufferable. 

“Off to see your girlfriend?” She teases from the doorway, crossing her arms and leaning on the door as she watches her get on her bike.

Ruby tries to ignore her, adjusting the beanie on her head and swallowing her response. 

“Rabies, c’mon! I know she’s like a goddess or something but that doesn’t mean she gets a free pass at dating my precious _ittle wittle_ baby sister—”

“Bye, Yang!” Ruby calls out, ignoring the burning in her cheeks.

“—and _when_ are you going to bring her to meet the family, just because you like her doesn’t mean she should get a free pass—”

“ _Bye,_ Yang!” Ruby promptly bolts.

“Your magic is pretty.” Ruby tells her softly, watching the way that Weiss shows her how she molds the ice around her. 

Weiss smiles, a small ice castle sitting in her hands. She fiddles with it for a moment, and from the side a small garden appears, equipped with a small knight and slightly taller princess. She carefully thrust her hands toward her, adjusting herself so that she was facing toward her entirely.

Ruby peers into Weiss’ palms, smiling at the tiny ice roses and bushes and trees. They were too tiny to see all the detail, but Ruby couldn’t help but feel that the entire thing was beautiful.

“Really pretty.” Ruby nods, her voice a whisper.

“You call lots of things that are mine pretty.” Weiss notes, looking at Ruby with a small frown on her face. Weiss chews on her cheek, a nervous tick that Ruby had quickly become fond of.

“Just ‘cause I say it a lot doesn’t make these things any less pretty, y’know.” Ruby says sagely, nodding her head. It was important to her that Weiss knew that every time she complimented her she meant it.

“Hmm.” Weiss considers her for a moment. “I suppose.”

“It’s the truth!” Ruby squawks.

Weiss smiles, a fond, slanted thing. “Of course, Ruby.”

“Pfft, you sound like you don’t believe me.” She pouts, crossing her arms and shooting Weiss a playfully hurt look.

“I believe that you believe it.” Weiss responds easily, magicking away her ice sculpture and raising a brow.

“What, that the parts of you I’ve seen are pretty?” Ruby asks, tilting her head a little.

Weiss stares at her for a moment, her eyes roaming her face thoroughly. “Yes.”

“Well, it’s the _truth_ , I think anyone can see that, Weiss.” Ruby says, feeling a bit disgruntled despite herself. It’s quiet for a moment, their eyes remaining on each other. Ruby couldn’t quite believe how weird Weiss was being about this. She understood that Ruby thought she was pretty didn’t she? Suddenly she was unsure, and her knee started to bounce as she struggled to regulate her awkward energy.

“You’d be surprised.” Weiss says, and her eyes are glowing again, ethereal and strange and—

“Anyone who thinks that you’re anything other than _beautiful_ is very dumb, I think.” Ruby blurts out, her cheeks coloring in embarrassment.

“Beautiful is a bigger word than pretty.” Weiss murmurs after a moment, her words slow and careful, almost as if she wanted to be sure that she’d heard Ruby correctly.

“So?” Ruby curls in on herself a little, and couldn’t help it when her tone went defensive. “I already said it’s the truth, right?” She twitched, shivering for a moment.

Weiss’ expression smoothed out. “I suppose you did.”

“You _always_ say ‘I suppose’ we should, like, find you something new to say.” Ruby complains with a careful smile. “Maybe you should try out ‘I guess’ or maybe an ‘oh yeah’.”

“No thank you,” Weiss dismissed her with the upward curve of her lips. The odd tension faded, and once again everything felt bright and merry. “I am quite satisfied with my current vocabulary.”

“Pfft, okay, Miss Dictionary.” Ruby laughs, falling back into the snow. 

Weiss sighs, and with a snap of her fingers makes sure that it won’t melt as to not give Ruby a cold. “Was that supposed to be an insult?” She drawls, crawling over her, tilting her head and peering into Ruby’s eyes. It’s an odd position for her to be in, her body not quite straddling her, but close enough to where if Ruby were to lean upward their faces would be very close to each other.

“Nope!” She says, popping the ‘p’ and ignoring the sudden rapid thundering in her heart. “I’m teasing you, it’s what friends do.”

“Hmm.” Weiss’ expression goes from mischievous to something else, a face that Ruby doesn’t know the name of—but she knows that it’s a great deal softer than she’d ever seen before. “We are friends, then?”

“Yeah!” Ruby exclaims, her eyes going wide. She faltered for a moment, stilling in the snow. “I mean, I thought we were.” She shifts uncomfortably for a moment, startlingly aware of the way Weiss looks at her. “Are... are we not?”

“I’ve never had a friend before.” Weiss says, avoiding the question.

“Well... I can be your first, if you want.” Ruby murmurs.

Weiss watches her, eyes sharp and blue and scrutinizing. She crawls backward, away from Ruby and back to where she had been sitting. “Yes.” She says after a moment, “I think I’d like that.”

Ruby beams.

Ruby doesn’t understand it at first. It’s not exactly a surprise, seeing as she’s never quite felt anything like it before. The tugging at her chest has been there since she was five, since she became connected to the half-gods in the forest, but this kind of pull was profoundly _different._ It wasn’t as desperate, for one, and it was warmer too—like she had just finished eating soup or drinking hot chocolate. 

She wasn’t stupid, she knew that she had something of a _crush_ on Weiss. Ruby had known that from the moment she’d met her, but that didn’t change the fact that it had been a _crush_ —fleeting and soft but nothing sustainable. 

Ruby didn’t think it was a crush anymore.

“Have you ever been in love before, Yang?” She asks her sister on a spring day, one of the rare ones she doesn’t go out to see Weiss.

“Uh.” Yang looks like a deer caught in headlights. “Yeah...?” She shifts, looking uncharacteristically sheepish. “I um, yeah.” She finishes lamely.

Ruby decides to ignore her stumbling. “What’s it like?”

Yang tells her.

Ruby finds Weiss speaking to a bear. She stills, her mouth falling open as she watches Weiss begin to thoroughly chastise it. The bear seemed almost sheepish, laying on the floor and putting its head on it’s arms. It was big, Ruby noticed distantly, _really really big._

“Spring isn’t here yet!” Weiss says, hands on her hips with her back to Ruby. “Why are you awake? That’s _dangerous_ right now, you know that.”

The bear made a noise.

“He _woke_ you up?” Weiss asks, her voice softening. 

The bear made another noise.

“He wanted you... to _eat_ someone for him?”

An affirmative huffing sound.

Weiss crosses her arms, and Ruby doesn’t have to see her face to know how tired she must look. A sigh escapes her mouth as she reaches up after a moment to pinch the bridge of her nose and says something that sounds like, “ _Whitley_.”

“Uh.” Ruby began, shifting in the snow and trying to come to terms with the fact that Weiss had been speaking to a huge bear. “Am I interrupting something?”

“Ruby!” Weiss jumps, spinning to face her. Her cheeks color as she straightens out her posture, coughing into a fist as though she could hide the redness of her face and ears. “Er, hello.”

“Hi.” Ruby says back, smiling at her. “Um, hello to you too!” She nods towards the bear. She shivers a little bit, rubbing her hands together and bringing them to her mouth and blowing warm air on them. She pulls her scarf back up to her nose when she's done, sighing a bit in relief.

Weiss and the bear exchange a look. The bear makes another noise.

“Don’t ask me.” Weiss says, frowning. “I don’t exactly understand humans either.”

“You know it’s kind of rude to talk about me right in front of me.” Ruby grins, and can’t quite help the amused look she sends them both. She doesn’t know who the bear is, but he seemed pretty cool. (Well, pretty cool for a _huge bear._ )

“My apologies.” Weiss rolls her eyes, “Dave here—”

_Dave?_

“—wanted to know why you breathed onto your paws—er, hands I mean.” Weiss twitches and tries not to look like she’s interested in the answer.

Ruby privately thinks it’s cute. 

“Well.” She starts, “My hands were cold, so I blew warm air on them to make them less cold.”

Weiss and the bear ( _is his name really Dave?_ ) exchange another perplexed look. It’s quiet for another awkward moment, until the bear ( _Dave_ ) makes another noise. Finally, Weiss shrugs and Dave ( _the bear_ ) seems to drop the issue.

“Well.” Ruby says after Weiss had finally managed to convince Dave to go back to his cave. “That was nice.” She turns to look at Weiss and narrows her eyes a little, pouting. “You didn’t tell me you can speak to animals.”

“Oh.” Weiss looks surprised for a moment. “Well it didn’t exactly come up.”

“I guess.” Ruby puffs out her cheeks. She sighs after a moment, smiling a little and looking back at Weiss. “That was really cute, y’know.”

Weiss colors slightly, averting her gaze. “I don’t know what you meant.”

Ruby laughs, moving a little closer and carefully reaching to grasp Weiss’ palms in her own. “You were confused.” She grins, making sure to look her in the eyes. “It was cute, dude.”

“Dude...?” Weiss frowns. “Isn’t that the word you said meant ‘friend’?”

“Sorta.” Ruby shrugs.

Weiss looks down at their hands, “Are you still cold?”

“Um.” Ruby swallows. “A little.”

(A lot actually, but she wasn’t going to tell her that.)

“I see.” Weiss murmurs. “Allow me...?”

“Sure.” Ruby says, curious as to what Weiss had wanted to do.

Weiss smiles, a nervous, pretty thing.

Ruby stills, and notices that her eyes have begun to glow that ethereal blue again. She wonders briefly if Weiss had much control over that or not, but before she could think on it more she was moving, drawing Ruby’s hands closer to her and up towards her face—lingering in front of her mouth. 

Weiss pauses, looking up imploringly at Ruby through her eye-lashes, and the expression on her face was nearly enough for her to collapse.

Ruby’s eyes widen, and she nods her head, doing her best to regulate her breathing. She didn’t know what Weiss was doing yet, didn’t know what she had intended, but the soft puffs of air on her fingers made blood rush into her face.

She closes her eyes, and Ruby’s knees almost buckle in relief. Weiss couldn’t see her at that moment, couldn’t see the overwhelming emotion in her eyes, and for that Ruby would be eternally grateful.

She takes the second she has to memorize the features of Weiss' face—(the pale sprinkle of freckles, her strong nose, the careful curve of her lips)—and Ruby is overcome by the urge to hold her cheeks in her hands. It’s difficult for her, to disregard Weiss’ beauty so that she doesn’t do something stupid like kiss her or something, but somehow she manages it—the breath ripped from her lungs as she struggles to breathe without letting Weiss know just how badly her _closeness_ was effecting her.

Without further preamble, Weiss blows hot air onto her hands, gripping her palms and rubbing them together. 

Ruby swallows the lump in her throat when her lips brush against the back of her fingers, swallows the lump in her throat when Weiss’ lips curve upward. She doesn’t know how she’s supposed to do this, tell her—especially considering the circumstances that surround them.

(She’s sure that she's fallen in love with a goddess. She’s sure that she's fallen in love with someone who would live beyond her.)

Ruby guesses that she’s just going to have to come to terms with that.

Ruby guesses that she’s just going to have to keep her love subtle.

And when Weiss pulls away, a delicious flush in her cheeks as she shoots Ruby an almost cocky look, Ruby resolves herself to failing those tasks every time.

“I wonder how long this will last, sometimes.” Weiss admits to her, they lay in a meadow, and Ruby is overcome by the realization that this is the first time she’s seeing Weiss in the spring.

Her appearance doesn’t change much despite the shifting seasons, but there is more life to her, it’s like she looks more _human._ Ruby doesn’t know if it’s because she’s finally in the presence of living plants other than pine trees and the occasional resilient bushes or it’s because Ruby is _with_ her. It feels almost too much like she’s being cocky when she thinks of the second reason, but she almost can’t help but wonder. She sees the way Weiss acts in front of her, so _excited_ for a friend to share things with, and can’t help it when the fluttering of hope makes her heart pound just a little faster.

“What do you mean?” Ruby asks, setting down the half made flower crown on her chest and turning her head to where Weiss lay. 

Her hands were pillowed underneath her head, and her hair was down—long and snowy strands curling around her ears and her cheeks. Weiss had explained to her that even though it wasn’t hot enough to affect Ruby’s hair, it was definitely warm enough to affect Weiss’. 

Ruby thought it was kind of cute.

“I am afraid.” Weiss admits after a moment, and Ruby can see her eye-lashes fluttering as she hesitates to close her eyes. “You are... wonderful.”

“You’re wonderful too.” Ruby breaths, trying to ignore the sudden lack of air in her lungs.

Weiss’ lips twitch upward almost ever so slightly. “Thank you.” She turns to look back at Ruby, and the sudden sadness in her eyes contradicts every moment from before that one. “The people will demand a sacrifice.” She whispers, moving to lay on her side. “If it is not me and my siblings... I fear my father may have something planned for you.”

“I’m not giving you up.” Ruby states firmly, also moving to lay on her side. They face each other, and this close Ruby can see more freckles across her nose and cheekbones—revealed by the spring sun. “That’s not even an idea worth considering, Weiss.”

“He’ll hurt you.”

“I can be strong.” Ruby insisted.

“Strength doesn’t help if he hurts your family.”

“Where do you think I learned it?” Ruby retorts.

“Clever girl.” Weiss sighs, sounding a mix between exasperated and fond. “You’re making my life harder by being so stubborn, don’t you know?

“Well.” Ruby puffs out her cheeks, “I can totally say the same thing about you, y’know.”

Weiss can’t seem to help her smile at that, as they look into each other's eyes, a quiet sense of reverence settling onto the both of them. 

Ruby’s breath catches in her throat when she notices Weiss’ eyes begin to glow again, a gentle blue light. She reaches out carefully, stilling when Weiss stiffens before nodding her consent. Ruby swallows, and continues, setting her fingers against one of Weiss’ cheeks. She isn’t quite confident enough to cup it in her palm, but she has just enough courage to trace the lines of her face, the pads of her fingers brushing soft against skin.

“Your eyes are pretty.” Ruby murmurs.

“You’ve said that.” Weiss says back, her voice equally quiet.

“People repeat facts all the time.” Ruby smiles, pulling away. To her surprise, Weiss seems to go a little pink at that.

“Thank you.” Her voice is soft, her eyes fluttering shut.

Something in Ruby’s chest twists. “For what?”

“For being my friend.”

And Ruby _wants_.

“My siblings found out about you.” Weiss tells her one day. “Only one of them trusts my judgment, I’m afraid.”

“Oh.” Ruby considers her for a moment, fingering the completed flower crown in her hands. “My sister knows about you too, actually. She kind... of wants to meet you? She keeps teasing me.” She looks down at her flower crown, smiling proudly at the blue and red flowers. “Here, I made this for you.”

“A crown?” Something in her expression twists.

“Yeah!” Ruby grins happily, missing the soft look Weiss shoots her. “Can I put it on you?”

Weiss considers her for a moment, before she bows her head.

Ruby is careful, gently putting the crown on Weiss. Her fingers brush against her hair, soft and cool to the touch despite the warmth of the spring day. “There!” Ruby says cheerfully, before leaning back and shooting Weiss a sly wink, “Pretty girl.”

Weiss flushes deeply, averting her gaze and coughing into the palm of her hand. “Thank you.” She whispers quietly, looking so _cute_ that for a moment Ruby forgets about everything but her.

“Um.” Ruby squeaks. She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath and tries to swallow the overwhelming amount of feelings that had surfaced with a single gesture. “It’s nothing.”

“Your goddess had a crown, you know.” Weiss admits. “It’s nothing like this one.” She reaches up, fiddling with some of the petals and smiling up at them. “Hers was huge, and while it was made of vines and thorns they were no flowers except roses—where you get your name from, I assume.” 

“Oh.” Ruby says. “What was she like?”

“She had massive silver antlers.” Weiss lifted her arms above her head, as though trying to show Ruby just how big they were. “They were beautiful, terrifying though.” She laughs. “And she was kind to us, she mourned when she realized she’d damned us—and though my siblings never could forgive her, I understood why she couldn’t lift the curse.”

“Why?”

Weiss hums. “I understood the desire to see my father suffer.” She closes her eyes. “I was so full of _anger_ , then—technically I _still_ am, but mostly I’m just... tired, I suppose.”

“...what did she do?” Ruby asks, looking away. “How am I—how is it that I’m... _connected_ to her?”

“Truly?” Weiss looks at her, and for the first time Ruby sees the exhaustion that lines her face. “I suspect that she bound herself to the same curse as us, a penance, I think.”

“And what does that mean exactly?” Ruby asks, her voice wobbly.

“I...” Weiss closes her eyes. “You aren’t her, Ruby, you need not worry about that. I believe that every single one of your predecessors held their own soul—but, well, I also believe that she...” A soft sigh. “I think she’s there, inside of each of you, watching or asleep or trapped... A punishment for herself. She was selfless, your goddess. Selfless and enraged.”

“But, she let all of them hurt you?” Ruby asks. “And she was the one to take notice of when you first died right? That’s how she gave you the warning... none of this makes any sense.”

Weiss smiles. “She was there yes, but in the soul of your first ancestor. My father was convinced that if he could find a way to end the cycle of rebirth, he could go back to how it had been before, luckily for him, he had three perfect specimens for experimentation—and so he deceived the first of your family.”

“Okay?” Ruby continues shakily.

“Your goddess was furious.” Weiss purses her lips, “She awoke in her child’s body to the... to the corpses of my siblings and I.”

Ruby could barely smother her gag.

“She decided to do one last thing.” Weiss says quietly. “And gave us our warning, before... well, I don’t know, to be honest.” She shrugs, fiddling with her hair. “She’s gone... we can’t feel her anymore.”

“I don’t...” Ruby wraps her arms around her legs and brings her knees closer to her chest. “I’m so sorry.” She shuts her eyes.

“It isn’t your fault.” Weiss scoots toward her, leaning forward and setting her hands on Ruby’s knees. She peers down into her face, her brow furrowed in concern as she tried to get Ruby to look at her. “Hey.” She murmurs softly. “I wish you would look at me, I beg it of you.”

“I’m sorry.” Ruby says again, feeling tears begin to burn in her eyes. “I don’t like what you have to go through. It isn’t fair.”

“I... I know.” Weiss grips Ruby’s knees in her hands, a reassuring squeeze for the both of them. “But I am thankful to you.” One of her palms moves to cup her cheek, tipping back her head so they looked each other in the eye. “You have given me a friend... I’ve not had one of those in quite some time.” She pauses. “Well, I’ve not had a friend who wasn’t an _animal_ in quite some time.”

Ruby sniffles, the sight of Weiss blurred by tears, and a soft wanting sound leaves the back of her throat.

It must be obvious, at that moment, her feelings—overwhelming and _there_ on her face, plain as day.

Weiss blinks, before smiling at the sound, shutting her eyes and setting her forehead to Ruby’s. “Stubborn girl.” She whispers fondly, “Don’t you know such things may as well be forbidden between us?” A soft laugh. “Our history is bathed in blood.”

“Stop it.” Ruby whispers. “I _know_ , I... why do you think it hurts so much?”

“It hurts me the same, I think.” Weiss says.

“I’m sorry—” A hiccup escapes Ruby’s mouth. “—sorry for everything, but... but to apologize for feeling the way I do would be to lie, and I’m not very good at lying.”

“Well,” Weiss sighs, “I suppose the same could be said for me, except that I am actually rather good at lying, but I would not find myself doing it to you.” She wipes the tears from Ruby’s eyes with the pads of her thumbs, and Ruby has never been more afraid to open up her eyes.

“What...?” She asks softly, “What do you mean by that?”

“I think you know.” Weiss admits softly, “And if you don’t then I suppose I gave you more credit then you deserve.”

“You said it was practically forbidden.” Ruby murmurs, finally opening her eyes. “You _said_ —”

“Yes.” Weiss whispers. “I suppose I did.”

But before she could pull away, Ruby was surging forward.

“I don’t care.” She murmurs against Weiss’ mouth right before their lips are pressed together. Ruby kisses Weiss through the squeak that escapes her mouth, and it’s only half a second, only a brief moment where everything feels right and warm. She pulls back immediately, nervous and afraid, and hopes that Weiss would forgive her.

Weiss gapes, her eyes widening as she stares back at Ruby, her cheeks pink. “You...” She’s breathless, and it’s clear that even though it was barely a real kiss it had affected her just as much as it affected Ruby. “You kissed me.”

“Yeah.” Ruby says softly, dazed. “Yeah I did.”

“I thought you wouldn’t.” Weiss admits. “I thought you’d pull away.”

“You mean like you did?” Ruby asks, and there’s no masking the hurt in her voice. “I mean...” She sighs, and scoots back into the flowers of the meadow they sit in. “I get it, y’know? If you don’t like me I mean.” She bites at her thumb, suddenly feeling bad. “I should have asked instead of just... but I dunno, I guess for a moment I thought you might’ve felt the same.”

Weiss flicks her forehead. “Did you forget the loaded conversation we just had?”

“No!” Ruby says, rubbing the spot that’d been flicked. “It’s just, I _dunno_? You could have actually meant all that stuff be about friendship and I might’ve just looked into it too much like an idiot and—”

“Silly girl.” Weiss says affectionately. “I am very much fond of you.”

“Fond?” Ruby asks hopefully.

Weiss rolls her eyes. “Yes.”

“Oh that’s cool, that’s cool!” Ruby nods her head, puffing out her cheeks as she tries not to fall over at her overwhelming embarrassment. She falters for a moment, the gravity of the situation beginning to weigh on her once more. “What do we do now?”

Weiss hums, tilting her head thoughtfully. “Well.” She began, moving forward and wrenching Ruby’s legs out from her arms. Weiss smiled coyly for a moment, clambering onto her lap with a soft sigh. “First, I kiss you.”

“Oh.” Ruby squeaks, her arms wrapping around Weiss’ waist. “And after?”

“I figured we could play it by ear.” Weiss shrugs, reaching up and brushing Ruby’s bangs out of her face, pale fingers twisting the red strands. “You’ve thrown me off my equilibrium, you know.” She says, looking chastising. “The least you could do is offer me a kiss before we go and wreck the church's reality.”

“My bad.” Ruby finally manages to smile back. “You know, they told me my mom was a saint, implied that I’d be one too.”

“Oh?” Weiss asks her, looking amused and pressing her forehead to Ruby’s.

“Yeah.” She winks. “But little did they know—”

“Okay that’s enough talking, kiss time.” Weiss says, and presses her mouth to Ruby’s. She startles, and their teeth clack together, causing Weiss to let out a frustrated groan. “Stay still.” She hisses quietly, grasping Ruby by the jaw and tilting her head upward to meet Weiss’ lips.

“Sorry—” Ruby squeaks, cut off by the soft (if a little hasty) kiss. She relaxes, and though Weiss’ mouth moves too fast and hers too slow they soon find a middle ground that suits both of them. It’s better than the first two, mainly because they get a chance to reciprocate and there’s no teeth clacking.

_What’s it like to kiss a goddess?_

Well, Ruby finally has the answer to that question.

She has a feeling it differs depending on the goddess in question, but she doesn’t care much for distinctions when Weiss’ lips move against hers. That’s the first thing, she thinks, when you kiss a goddess the world seems to fall away. The area around you fades to white, and the only thing left is the feeling of her against you—at least that’s how it was for Ruby. Weiss doesn’t kiss very softly, she notices, wild in a way that absolutely must come with her divinity—her lips were reckless in a way that no one who knew that one day the world would fade in an eternal darkness would be.

She knew how it felt to die, sure, but Weiss was still effectively a goddess, still effectively _immortal_.

It makes her lips quick, chasing Ruby’s after each moment taken for a breath of air.

(She thinks that Weiss kisses her so quick because she’s afraid that if she slows down for even a moment it’ll end, and the realization is heart warming as it is sad.)

Ruby, in contrast, kisses Weiss slowly—careful movement after careful movement, almost as though she was afraid that she’d fall to ash in her hands. She feels the way Weiss moves against her—(insistent and almost afraid)—and responds with steady hands, pressing her palm against her hip and squeezing slightly, to ground her. It doesn’t exactly do what Ruby had meant it to—(considering the way that Weiss had moaned into her mouth)—but it gets her to pace herself a little, at least.

Ruby pulls away, her chest heaving breathlessly, and when it becomes obvious to Weiss that she would not be getting another kiss on the lips anytime soon—she begins to pepper little ones all over Ruby’s face.

She can’t help the giggles as Weiss presses her mouth to her cheeks, her eyelids, her forehead, her chin, her nose—anywhere she can manage.

Finally, Weiss pulls away, mouth puffy and cheeks a deep, blinding crimson. “Adequate.” She decides, murmuring to herself and nodding.

Ruby snorts. “Adequate?”

“Yes.” Weiss says shortly, averting her gaze and pursing her lips. “Adequate.”

“Okay then.” Ruby rolls her eyes, though she can’t hide her grin. “I _guess_ that kiss was... alright.”

“Alright?” Weiss questioned sharply, narrowing her eyes. “I’ll show you _alright_ , Ruby Rose.” 

“Sounds good!” Ruby cheers, patting at Weiss’ hips.

Her face goes pink, blood rushing so quickly to her cheeks that for a moment Ruby is actually kind of worried. Her freckles stand out against the redness, and she couldn’t help but begin to count them.

Weiss shoves at her face before she can finish.

“ _Oof—_ ” Ruby grunts and falls backward, accidentally bringing Weiss down with her.

Weiss lets out a strangled shriek, landing onto Ruby’s chest and accidentally elbowing her in the side. 

Ruby wheezes out a laugh, her arms going around Weiss’ back as the sounds of her delight escape her mouth. “You’re so _bad_ at this.” She sings lovingly, pulling Weiss upward and burying her nose into her neck. “It’s so _cute_.”

Weiss lets out a grumbling protest, pushing against Ruby in an attempt to get back up. “Shut your mouth.”

Ruby smiles against the skin of Weiss’ throat, her chest pounding pounding _pounding_ —

Ruby freezes.

The pull is gone.

It sends a nervous shiver down her spine, but before she can open her mouth and mention it, Weiss was curling into her—mumbling something about the least she could do was make her comfortable. Ruby stares up at the spring sky, feeling... not empty, she was too happy for that, but _strange_. She’d lived with that pull since the moment her mother died, had felt it tugging on her and pulling what felt like her very soul apart.

But it was _gone._

Weiss nudges her nose into Ruby’s shoulder, and even though something (not fear, exactly, but something similar) surges up inside of her, she can’t help but want to ignore it—just this once. If it turned out to be something important, they’d deal with it together, but for now Ruby lay with Weiss in the meadow—watching the clouds roll by as they remained intertwined with one another.

And if it was something bad, well.

Ruby held Weiss a little closer.

At least they had this moment.

**Author's Note:**

> i originally had some schneebling interactions in this but it just didn't make the cut smh and dave the bear has my whole heart thanky
> 
> also, look i know that passion for publication by anarbor has literally nothing to do with this fic but one line in that song went hard enough to inspire this entire goddamn thing okay??? the dude sang ‘what they don’t tell you in churches is saints are sinners too’ and i just went fucking insane, okay???? i went fucking feral, right????? i just could not function
> 
> this was honestly supposed to be so much WORSE and i'm so glad that i was too much of a weak bitch to do anything else with it because ughh. just thinking about what this could've been is heartbreaking to me... like i can't even do it to myself so how the fuck am i gonna do it to u guys?
> 
> edit:
> 
> [sagaschan on tumblr drew the scene between weiss and ruby after she scolds dave the bear and it's amazing](https://sagaschan.tumblr.com/post/621207279629385729/so-basically-iwillwalk500miles-s-recent-fic-what)


End file.
